Failing at math, failing at geography

It's 1965.

Major League Baseball has 20 teams.
Pro football - across both the NFL and AFL - has 22 teams.
The NBA, in its 16th season, has 9 teams.

The National Hockey League, in its 48th season of operation, has 6 teams. 

Hockey is a very regional sport, and it would be understandable to believe that the sport would only appeal to residents of Canada and the northernmost parts of the U.S. 

But broadcast money is a big deal in other sports. The NHL is missing out. They can appeal to a wider audience nationally if they're on US TV. If they're on US TV, more fans will see the game and want a team in their area. More exposure, more teams, more money. (Oh, and more jobs for players I guess...)

 

The NHL announces plans to double the size of their league: six new teams will be added in 1967, to coincide with the league's 50th anniversary. Over a dozen cities across North America apply for teams.


Aside from the politics of satisfying pre-existing relationships, the league has to consider cities with the broadest appeal. Baseball's westward expansion to Los Angeles and San Francisco was a success - large, growing populations hungry for pro sports teams. The state of California has a population of over 18 million in 1965; surely some small fraction of them would support pro hockey.

Having a cross-country presence is admittedly a big swing. The NHL wants to make some headway in the national sports landscape, particularly in winter months when baseball and football are over. But there are major media markets in the northeast that, you know, have winter.

Pittsburgh and Philadelphia make sense. Natural rivalries with New York (and each other) and plenty of sports fans. Expanding the NHL's footprint in a major population center? Check. Traditional ice hockey-weather cities? Check. Pleasing friends and partners of existing NHL owners? Check.

Two teams out west, two teams out east. Now to fill in the center of the map... and we can't forget about

Minnesota. It's the state of hockey, dontcha know. How could an NHL team possibly fail here?


St. Louis has a strong pro sports tradition and a venue in place - which happens to be controlled by the owners of the closest existing team, the Chicago Black Hawks. It's a favor, but a sensible one.

Cross-country coverage complete. 

What's that? The south?!?

You're kidding right? There's no interest. California is one thing, but let’s be real. Where could the National Hockey League possibly put a team? Texas? Florida? Pssh. That would never work.

Splitting these teams into two divisions along geographical lines should be simple. It should probably look something like this:

East - Boston, Montreal, Toronto, New York, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh
West - Detroit, Chicago, Minnesota, St. Louis, Los Angeles, San Francisco Oakland

Sounds good, yes?

This would be unfair to the incoming teams, who would struggle to make the playoffs for the foreseeable future if they had to compete against long-established squads. So instead we'll split the teams thusly:


East - Boston, Montreal, Toronto, New York, Detroit, Chicago
West - Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, Minnesota, St. Louis, Los Angeles, Oakland

The extra travel might be rough for some teams(especially the Pennsylvania clubs) but the expense will be offset by playoff revenue. Four brand new expansion squads will be guaranteed to make the postseason. One expansion team will be guaranteed a berth in the Final. Everyone is happy.

Well, almost everyone...

Western Canada gets left out in the cold. The NHL passes on a strong expansion bid by a group from Vancouver. Naturally, the fans blame Gary Bettman. Sure, he's only a teenager at the time and has no involvement in pro sports leagues of any kind. But we all know how much he hates Canada.

Vancouver is promised dibs on a team in the next round of expansion.

After doubling the size of their league, the prudent thing for the NHL would be to let the "second six" find solid footing before adding more teams and watering down the rosters any further.

Two more teams will be added three years later - one in the East...

... and another one in the East:

uh... Vancouver is in the East... right?

Yes, of course. It says so right here:

The "West" division is already home to all the 1967 expansion teams. Slotting in the Sabres would make less sense geographically but it would at least line up with the plan to have one divison of established teams and one division of expansion teams. 

Chicago gets to join St. Louis in the West, since it was largely their idea to choose the Blues in the first place. The NHL could take this opportunity to realign the divisions. 

 

Eh, maybe next time.

Not only do the Canucks get to pile up frequent flyer miles, they get to play two thirds of their games against the Bruins, Rangers, Canadiens, and Maple Leafs. Sure, they'll struggle to win games. But we've got to build that cross-Canada rivalry! 

Now... how should the NHL decide who gets to pick 1st overall in the entry draft? There's a terrific young center available that any team would be thrilled to build their team around. He could go a long way toward making one of these clubs respectable, perhaps even successful, within five years. 

Oh! How about we spin a big ol' numbered carnival wheel? Half for Buffalo, half for Vancouver. Whichever team it lands on gets their choice of selecting first in the amateur draft or the expansion draft.

Orr... we could spin the wheel twice. Win the spin, pick first. Win both spins, pick first in both drafts. 

 

Vancouver, you'll get the numbers before 7, Buffalo, you'll get anything after 7. If it lands on 7, we'll re-spin.  

Oh, and make sure you put a '1' on that wheel, since it's for pick number 1 (and also because that's how numbers start.)

 

 

Oh hey... it landed on 1. The commissioner said so. Vancouver wins!


Nope, it landed on 11 (and there's no '1' on the wheel anyway), so Buffalo wins the draft rights to Gilbert Perreault.

 

Say, Gil, what number would you like to wear? 

Oh that's just mean

Buffalo wins the first pick in the expansion draft and the waiver draft and the entry draft. But that's all the good fortune that franchise will ever have. Vancouver, you'll be fine. You're good Canadian boys. 

Interpreted as: most regular-season wins by NHL team in the 70s

		TEAM	W	GP	L	T	PTS	PTS%	G	GA	DIFF	PP%	PK%	S/GP	S%	SA/GP	SV%
1		Canadiens	499	788	155	134	1,132	.718	3,258	2,003	1,255	30.1	82.3	32.89	12.6	28.75	.912
2		Bruins	485	788	188	115	1,085	.688	3,304	2,293	1,011	22.0	78.4	33.64	12.5	27.78	.895
3		Flyers	393	788	244	151	937	.595	2,714	2,157	557	24.6	79.8	32.82	10.5	29.41	.907
4		Rangers	387	788	278	123	897	.569	2,867	2,508	359	26.2	77.1	33.59	10.8	28.90	.890
5		Black Hawks	379	788	273	136	894	.567	2,575	2,206	369	18.6	80.4	29.55	11.1	30.74	.909
6		Maple Leafs	334	788	324	130	798	.506	2,613	2,529	84	23.3	80.0	32.69	10.1	32.16	.900
7		Sabres	332	712	251	129	793	.557	2,481	2,227	254	21.4	81.9	31.18	11.2	29.49	.894
8		Kings	302	788	359	127	731	.464	2,416	2,596	-180	22.1	78.8	29.86	10.3	30.51	.892
9		Penguins	300	788	353	135	735	.466	2,562	2,718	-156	21.3	76.0	31.79	10.2	31.45	.890
10		Blues	291	788	369	128	710	.451	2,295	2,618	-323	17.0	74.0	30.30	9.6	29.92	.889
11		Red Wings	281	788	388	119	681	.432	2,408	2,836	-428	22.4	77.8	30.07	10.2	30.22	.881
12		North Stars	256	788	401	131	643	.408	2,247	2,744	-497	18.2	75.6	29.49	9.7	32.63	.893
13		Islanders	252	556	200	104	608	.547	1,893	1,622	271	31.3	81.8	28.65	11.9	29.78	.902
14		Flames	233	556	228	95	561	.504	1,775	1,744	31	23.0	80.4	29.33	10.9	29.60	.894
15		Canucks	231	712	377	104	566	.397	2,122	2,659	-537	20.6	76.3	28.50	10.5	31.35	.881
16		Barons	185	708	410	113	483	.341	1,924	2,727	-803	15.1	74.2	27.62	9.8	33.13	.884

Aww shit. Maybe the 1980s will be better?

🏒

Thanks for reading!



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That was fast

It seems that COMC has finally gotten their act together.

My first order of 2024 was requested on the first day of 2024. It arrived on the 25th.

Of March.

 

Then, because COMC is the only place with affordable mid-grade 1956 Topps singles (fvck you very much, 4 Sharp Corners) I placed another order in spring. Requested shipping on May 12, received cards July 13th. 

Better, but still godawful. Both orders took so long to fill that I got an apology email with a $5 voucher for shipping on my next order. And so, like the sucker that I am, I placed order #3 and requested shipping on August 28th. I was expecting it to arrive around Halloween.


It got here yesterday. 12 days - that's almost like a real business. I didn't pay for expedited shipping or anything. 

Perhaps if I knew their turnaround times had drastically improved I'd have bought more cards and waited another month. Alas, I have just 40 cards to show off today - starting with the aforementioned '56 singles:

The seller I usually buy these from had a 25% off sale, and posted something else I'd had on my wantlist for years - a vintage Walter Payton card.

I'd been shopping around for a 1977 Topps Payton but the prices and my profits from eBay sales were never in sync. Instead I bought back the oldest football card I had as a young teenager.(That one was an OC copy with at least one rough corner.)

Some thick boys and prospects. There was a blue parallel #d/99 of the Syndergaard relic for about $2.50, but I bought the base for $1.27 and picked up the Pedro with the balance. My prospecting days are over but the Lazaro Montes was mislabeled and the Jackson Chourio was priced way too low.

Cheaper shiny here. Almost all were 50 cents each or less. Rasmus Asplund is a fringe NHL player but a blue color-matching auto for under $1.50 is hard to pass up; I nearly bought a Casey Mittlestadt Blue Rainbow auto for about $5, but then I would have had to put back the Prizms.

More hockey here (yes, the top two cards are from a hockey set.) The Neighbors and Cuylle Young Guns were a package deal; I sent an offer which basically got me the Cuylle for free. The Hull completes my Lost Rookie Cards insert set and triggered this order in the first place, since no one else has this card for under $8.

Picked up what I thought would be among the final Arizona Coyotes cards - but then I saw 2024-25 Upper Deck MVP was released without any mention of Utah. The Game Dated Moments card is ridiculous; the caption reads "Coyotes players say goodbye to the 2023-24 season...." Umm, what?!?!?

Finally some PC teams here, including a Blue Diamond Dustin (not to be confused with Dustin Diamond) and Juke Box Heroes inserts of the Hughes brothers. I foolishly bought the Yoshida and Casas refractors for 35 cents each even though I have absolutely no more room for any Red Sox inserts or parallels of any kind. I had to take out all the mini cards, put those in a separate box, and then it was still a tight squeeze.

I've had to get very selective about buying Boston base cards, too, as I only have space for about 20 across all my binders. Once my incoming Sportlots order arrives, I'll have less than a dozen pockets available.

And, not to dunk on COMC after giving them their flowers, but I bet the Sportlots seller will ship faster than 12 days. Just sayin' ;P

I did make one more very minor purchase. Picked up a couple cheapies on eBay and...

.... got that 2,000th feedback ten minutes after paying the seller. Woo-hoo!!! 🥳

Thanks for reading!



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You'll never see this on Secret Base

Hey, have you heard about the team that went 54 years without winning a Stanley Cup?

No, not that one... that one.

The Vancouver Canucks have a fascinating history, which I am tempted to break down in a multi-part series like I've done with the Oakland Athletics (or, like Secret Base would do if the Canucks weren't a hockey team.)

No other franchise has been to three Stanley Cup finals without winning one. That alone would make them the most likely candidate for such a series. The Mariners, Falcons, and Vikings stories were captivating and expertly told by Jon Bois and Alex Rubenstein. But I already knew most of the key players and moments. Many of their viewers did, too.

Wouldn't it be fun to learn a completely new story? Wouldn't it be interesting to learn the significance of this:

... or this?

... or this?

...or how this happened?

 ... or this?

...or this?

...or how the most beloved player in franchise history broke the career points record at the worst possible time?

...or just for fun, how about this?

Cause I could, ya know. I could tell you all about all of this. There won't be fancy charts or graphs, or that killer soundtrack... but I don't have any of that T-Mobil money, so words and pictures will have to do.

Would any of you have any interest in reading a four-part history of this franchise?

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